Lin Jing: How Americans educate their children to view life and death

Lin Jing: How Americans educate their children to view life and death. When it comes to "death", Chinese people always feel it is "unlucky"...

Lin Jing: How Americans educate their children to view life and death. When it comes to "death", Chinese people always feel it is "unlucky", so they not only deliberately rarely talk to their children in daily life, but also resolutely exclude it from children's education. Parents and teachers in the United States are happy to explain "death" to their children when they are 3-4 years old. Of course, this explanation is very simple and vivid. American child education experts have long discovered that due to the prosperity of the media and the rapid circulation of information, most 3-year-old children have actually been exposed to the word "death". They may mention "death" in communication with their friends, and feel both mysterious and afraid of it. They may also thoughtfully ask many related questions to adults: Will all of us die one day? Do I want my father, mother, grandpa, and grandma to die? Will my children and I have to die in the future? However, children generally need to be about 10 years old to understand the profound and abstract truth that "death is eternal" (that is, people cannot be resurrected after death). Before that, they often do not carry the heavy emotional baggage of grief caused by the death of their loved ones. They just want to know what death is like. American parents always give the most straightforward, simple and clear answers to children's "death questions", and try to avoid being specious or vague. In addition, they rarely use myths or religious legends such as heaven and hell to explain death, because they believe that although such explanations may be the simplest and easiest, if the child grows up and does not believe them, he will inevitably fall into a deeper confusion. Of course, Americans are not in favor of teaching "black superstitions" such as "people turn into ghosts after death" as knowledge. They believe that if "ghosts" are also depicted as ferocious monsters, the side effects may be greater. In addition to misleading children, this "explanation" will undoubtedly increase the likelihood of children having nightmares and artificially create nightmares. This greatly increases the child's fear and other psychological pressures, so that when someone is really dead in the family, the frightened children will not even dare to attend the memorial service of their relatives. To be more precise, the vast majority of American parents regard "death" as a kind of "emotional knowledge" and store it in their children's "knowledge base". When a death occurs, the child can use the "emotional knowledge" he needs to understand what is going on with the deep sadness he will face. Americans also believe that when children grow up to have enough understanding, teaching them some positive "views on life and death" may help them create an optimistic, cheerful and positive outlook on life. At this time, Americans often explain to children: In fact, "death" and "life" are natural and logical things. Without "death", there is no such thing as "life". Even inanimate things, such as stars, the earth and the sun, have their lifespans. When a person dies, his body disappears from the world, but his children continue his life, and the thoughts, works and good deeds he left behind may still be talked about by future generations. Some elementary schools in the United States even offer unique "death classes" where practitioners or nurses in the funeral industry who have received special training from the Ministry of Education come into the classroom to serve as teachers, and seriously discuss with the children what will happen when a person dies, and let the students take turns simulating encounters with their loved ones through drama. How to cope with situations such as death in a car accident, or experience the desolate feeling of suddenly becoming an orphan, or go into the crematorium to watch the whole process of cremation, or even design or participate in a simulated "farewell to the remains of a loved one" ceremony, etc. Although some people think that this may leave a shadow on the children's hearts, most education experts and parents have expressed unreserved support for this. The most exciting scene of "death education" in the United States is that more and more children, led by their parents or teachers, come to hospice homes in the suburbs that provide hospice services for terminally ill patients. Together with adults, they gently scatter colorful flower petals on the beds of the dying. Some children in the hospice show their deep respect for the "beauty of death" - they bravely hold the withered hands of the dying elderly or patients while sending them blessings. words, while watching him bid farewell to this world with a smile.